I went to the library today to stock up. Here's what I came home with:
Trying to Save Piggy Sneed - John Irving (shamed to admit I've never read any John Irving)
Catch-22 - Joseph Heller (a book I think I ought to read)
Women In Love - D.H. Lawrence (looked great)
Lolita - Nabokov (another book I think I ought to read)
The Rule of Four - Ian Caldwell & Dustin Thomason (looked interesting)
The Alienist - Caleb Carr (I keep seeing this book everwhere)
I'm on the waitlist for:
A Prayer for Owen Meany (thanks, kav!)
Reading Lolita in Tehran
Mr. Maybe (thanks, CariG!)
Assassination Vacation (thanks, kav!)
Feel free to tell me how lame/awesome you think my choices are, and what else I should be reading. Oh, and I'll definitely post my reviews as I work my way through the books.
Wednesday, August 03, 2005
Cracker Jack Box Surprise
(Warning: this posting isn't for men, really. I mean, unless you've got a penchant for reading about women's body issues. And if that sort of thing is up your alley, well, then I can't help you.)
Yesterday, as I was sitting in Vegas, all nice and relaxed, I had a thunderbolt of reality hit me on the 'noggin. I remembered I had a gyno appointment this morning. I didn't want to re-schedule it because I didn't want the $25 charge (stupid cancellation fee) and it was my first non-planned parenthood doctor visit in about 5 years, not to mention the fact that it's been about 2 years since my last checkup under the hood. (Naughty, I know. Lay off.) So since I was a little excited about getting good care for my nether regions, we drove back last night so I could go get poked and proded today.
During the exam is when the FIRST cracker jack box surprise occurred. Apparently, the 'yearly' exam now includes a lovely little anal probe. AH! HA HA HA HA! SURPRISE! Why haven't you other women been telling each other this little tidbit? And why has nobody told ME about this?!?
The SECOND cracker jack box surprise occurred when the doctor sent me for an ultrasound. And not the kind of ultrasound where they put jelly on your belly and slide the thing over it. No. This kind of ultrasound involves a sort of wand that they insert. AH HAH! LOVELY! SURPRISE! And it wasn't just that, it was the fact that they poke and prode inside the uterus. AHHHHHHHH! PAINPAINPAIN! As it turns out, I've got a collapsed cyst on one side and definite endometriosis symptoms on the other side of my uterus. (The WHITE-HOT pain was the indicator, apparently.)
Surprises aside, it was a lovely visit and I HEART this doctor. She's FABULOUS. And the office bathroom was the loveliest, coziest, nicest doctor's-office-bathroom I've been in, and that's saying something. And it's nice to know that my atomic-bomb cramps have a cause that's not just in my head.
Anyways, ladies, just so you know, prepare for the anal surprise and the ultrasound wand surprise next time you go for a visit. I just want all my peeps to be prepared.
Yesterday, as I was sitting in Vegas, all nice and relaxed, I had a thunderbolt of reality hit me on the 'noggin. I remembered I had a gyno appointment this morning. I didn't want to re-schedule it because I didn't want the $25 charge (stupid cancellation fee) and it was my first non-planned parenthood doctor visit in about 5 years, not to mention the fact that it's been about 2 years since my last checkup under the hood. (Naughty, I know. Lay off.) So since I was a little excited about getting good care for my nether regions, we drove back last night so I could go get poked and proded today.
During the exam is when the FIRST cracker jack box surprise occurred. Apparently, the 'yearly' exam now includes a lovely little anal probe. AH! HA HA HA HA! SURPRISE! Why haven't you other women been telling each other this little tidbit? And why has nobody told ME about this?!?
The SECOND cracker jack box surprise occurred when the doctor sent me for an ultrasound. And not the kind of ultrasound where they put jelly on your belly and slide the thing over it. No. This kind of ultrasound involves a sort of wand that they insert. AH HAH! LOVELY! SURPRISE! And it wasn't just that, it was the fact that they poke and prode inside the uterus. AHHHHHHHH! PAINPAINPAIN! As it turns out, I've got a collapsed cyst on one side and definite endometriosis symptoms on the other side of my uterus. (The WHITE-HOT pain was the indicator, apparently.)
Surprises aside, it was a lovely visit and I HEART this doctor. She's FABULOUS. And the office bathroom was the loveliest, coziest, nicest doctor's-office-bathroom I've been in, and that's saying something. And it's nice to know that my atomic-bomb cramps have a cause that's not just in my head.
Anyways, ladies, just so you know, prepare for the anal surprise and the ultrasound wand surprise next time you go for a visit. I just want all my peeps to be prepared.
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