I quiver for you, oh brave California peeps!

I remember what this was like...counting down the minutes, trying not to die, hating the evil CA bar examiners for having the balls of steel to make it a minute-by-minute countdown for bar results.

For all of you waiting on results, my hat is off to you. You are brave, and you'll be fine, no matter what happens! Hugs!

***
In other news, I interviewed today for an internal position at my current company. It'd be in a completely different part of the company, and sounds like it would be a great fit for me. Oh, and the fact that I'd be making a LOT more bank in the new position doesn't hurt! I have a really good shot of getting it because (a) I'm licensed (okay, WILL be as of June 11th), and (b) the manager wants to hire internally and according to the recruiter, I'm the only internal candidate he's considering. In a shocking turn of events, he wants to move quickly with this; I guess he'll be out of the office the first 2 weeks of June and wants to decide before then. Which means next week. Augh! So keep your fingers & toes crossed that I'll be relaying some very good news a week from today!

Life on the other side!

So here's how it all went down on Saturday. I kept thinking I was going to lose my breakfast, and decided to check the state bar website for shits and giggles. As soon as I saw the link for the results, my heart nearly stopped. No, really, I thought I was going to go into cardiac arrest. I finally scrolled down and as soon as I saw MY NAME WAS ON THE PASS LIST I burst into tears and sobbed (and sobbed and sobbed). I've never cried that hard over happy news! I just couldn't believe it. I kept making Husband pinch me. I'm still feeling emotional whenever I stop and realize I PASSED. I finally printed off the pass list so I wouldn't keep going back to the website to make sure my name is still on the list. It's just the most surreal, fantastic, amazing, humbling, gratifying, vindicating, AWESOME feeling ever. I'm just so grateful I passed. And so excited!

And can I tell you how much fun job hunting is now?!? I spent a good deal of time this weekend looking at the jobs that are out there. I met with another recruiter today; so far, none of them are telling me the relationship is exclusive, so I'm fully enjoying whoring it out with every agency I can, as well as any and all contacts I have. I really want to do estate planning (with maybe some land use thrown in), so I'm now turning my powers on to envisioning my future job and salary, etc., and I can't wait to start interviewing.

Oh, and how did I celebrate? I had wine and good food and champagne and shopping and sleeping and being lazy and napping! I got an awesome, brand new suit, and Husband got me a gorgeous new watch. I feel so professional and spiffy now! Also, tomorrow night Husband & I are going to see the touring cast of RENT! I'm so excited about seeing RENT! that I have to add the exclamation point. RENT! Yipee!!!

I guess I could sum all this up by saying that I've been disgustingly, deliriously happy all damn day. I'm just so buyouantly happy that I felt like I was floating all day. I tell you what, this is one of the BEST feelings I've ever had; I wish I could bottle it up and pull it out on crappy days.

I'm also excited because being licensed means I'll get to fulfill a very long-held dream to volunteer at a women's shelter, in a legal capacity. I can't wait to get started on that!

OH - I got Tori's new CD today; it fucking ROCKS! Go get it immediately!

SAY WHAT!!!!

I PASSED THE BAR!
I PASSED THE BAR!
I PASSED THE BAR!
I PASSED THE BAR!
I PASSED THE BAR!

Please place your tray table in the up-right position and firmly grab your vomit bags...

We're down to a matter of hours.

I am fucking freaking out.

I keep having waves of nausea wash over me.

I was feeling only mildly terrified until I decided to catch up on my blog reading...and discovered someone who found out they hadn't passed. I don't know what state they took, but it's just so sucky. And reading their post resulted in the bottom of my stomach dropping out, and ever since I've been vacillating between: being "calm" and being able to tell myself I'm going to be FINE because I KNOW I PASSED and almost bursting into tear and needing to run to the bathroom and loose my breakfast.

I'm just so terrified and worried and OHMYGOD CAN THIS JUST BE OVER WITH ALREADY.

Which is why I'm trying to distract myself with a terrible movie on USA - "The Triangle"...it's a bad movie at it's best.

Regardless of whether or not I actually do throw up in the next approximately 2 hours, I am ready for this to be over and to start the serious partying.

Countdown...and...GO!

Isn't there a song to the effect of "hey hey wait a minute Mr. Postman..."?

Well, on Saturday, my postman will be bringing me a Very Important Letter. VIL. Namely, this VIL will begin with "Congratulations...". My PASS! letter! Part of me CANNOT WAIT! Woo-hoo! I'll get to par-tay down like a rock star on Cinco de Mayo!

On the other hand...the closer it gets the more I fill with nervous energy/anxiety/dread.

I think I am excited because I am going to have ALCOHOL on Saturday! Yay! I haven't really been drinking since November - it's a calorie thing. I've been doing a lot of serious exercising and calorie-counting - even keeping a food diary. Oh, I'm totally hardcore. :)